The Hell I Created

 "Here, let me just do it. I can do it quickly and then it'll be done," "If I hurry and get this done, that's one less thing on my to-do list," "Submit this early and feel less stressed," or "the deadline is next week, I’ll just get started on it and get it out of the way,” or perhaps my famous last words “I don’t understand why everyone else is a procrastinator, why can’t they just get stuff done ahead of time?”

 

You’ve read articles, blogs, research articles and the like on procrastination and the like. You’ve probably read or heard so much about it that you can talk about it quite comfortably and be accurate about it. Though I procrastinated on writing this blog, this blog isn’t about it at all.

What many people have not heard of yet is precrastination. Or, in other words, the lack of any procrastination. You can read more about this fairly new phenomenon here. You may have met someone

that is a precrastinator, but instead of labelling it as such, you asked yourself, "why are they so keen on getting things done early?" "I can't work with them because they are hyper diligent and such a goody-two-shoes,” “teacher's pet,” “wants to outperform everyone and submit assignments early.” Finally, “they don’t have the patience or will let me do anything to help with group work.” 

That person they complained about was regrettably me.

 Back in 2019, I was a mom who went back to college. I had my children in a daycare, and I was able to change my career; I felt fortunate to do this. As I had taken time away from being with my children, failure was not an option. I had a home life, planning a wedding, trying to maintain a casual part-time job and a full course load that demanded mostly group or team dynamics. I was trying to be a perfect student with perfect marks in an unperfect world. 

I WAS LIVING IN A HELL I CREATED.

As time went on in school, I found my course load and the demands of my personal affairs getting the best of me. I was stressed beyond all measures. I would go home and cry every night, wondering how I would get through another week, another semester, another exam. With my task list, I wanted to get everything done and out of the way to find peace. I wanted to find time to relax and spend time with my children. The groups I was apart of were nothing like me. They were procrastinators (which is not always a bad thing I have learned. In fact, it can be a good thing. You can read about it here). But my tendency to get work done and out of the way bit me in the ass.

I recall many students not wanting to be in a group with me, students who would go to the teacher and voice their concerns about my tendency to get things done or do their work for them, or hell even that I was not being a good team member and sharing the work. When the instructor called me to a group meeting with the group, I felt targeted and ashamed and pointed out a new term “precrastination.”

I FELT SO SINGLED OUT.

Looking back, I’m sure this meeting and the instructor pointing out my precrastinating ways was to help point me in the right direction and overcome my tendencies. I’m sure it was to help others learn that perhaps not everyone views deadlines the same way. I didn’t mean to bring harm or discomfort to the group; I didn’t mean to cause them unnecessary stress because I was stressed, I didn’t mean to bring any undue hardship to others. I wanted the thought of the incomplete task out of the way. I wanted those voices in my head saying, “just get it done” “get it done and out of the way, so you don’t have to work about it.”

Throughout the last year, I have learned some coping mechanisms that I will share with you. It might come in handy if you, too, are a bit of a precrastinator and like to get shit done and out of the way. The goal here is to shed some light on helping you quiet those nagging voices in your head that you have something left undone.

1. Make a task list of your to-dos.

Making a task list of your to-dos will help keep you organized. While you’re at it, schedule when it’s due and schedule a time to work on it.

 

2. Ask for some damn help already.

When you are asked to add something else to your already big to-do list, ask yourself if this is something that others can help with or can be delegated to. Ask yourself what benefit will it have if you can break up the large task into smaller portions. Break the task down into smaller portions and schedule time for each task.

 
3. Breathe It Out.

Easier said than done. But take a few minutes and breathe deeply. Meditate on the assignment for an hour. Sleep on it. Whatever you do, do not pick up that pen or open your laptop. Let yourself feel the emotion of being stressed and anxious and breathe it out. You can read about the steps I use to help overcome my emotions here[AM2] .

4. Redefine being perfect!

This was a toughy. I had standards so high that even me, the precrastinating perfectionist, couldn't ever achieve. My standards were only meant for me, but I drug everyone else into helping me achieve those standards, and in the end, I added stress onto their plates. The only way to help with my perfectionist tendencies was to redefine my goals and what perfect means. (Overcoming perfectionism tendencies is hard work. It’s a work in progress, and I continue to overcome it to this day. Watch for the blog next week on overcoming being a perfectionist for some helpful tips and advice).

5. Reward yourself for little wins.

Just like procrastination, I found refuge in celebrating little wins. Did I stop after only completing a portion of the task? Did I celebrate by having an espresso and scheduling a break after getting the research out of the way? Did I have a nice dinner with family after I got the rough draft done?

6. Schedule “downtime.”

Finally, open up that calendar app and schedule in some downtime. For instance, go for a walk, meet Catherine for a coffee, have a bath with a good book, make a craft. It is equally important to find time for yourself and schedule it in.

If you are experiencing the stress of being a precrastinator then I encourage you to schedule an Consultation Call with me so you can get on your way to achieving your goals.